A literalist of the Imagination

I Want to Go to There part II (the Narnia Edition)

2011-01-08T13:46:00.002-07:00

I recently endeavored and succeeded in reading all seven of the Chronicles of Narnia. I LOVED THEM. I want to go to Narnia like nobody's business. And maybe marry Prince Caspian. No big deal.

Besides picturing Ben Barnes as Prince/King Caspian and being quite satisfied with that, there are a few other aspects of the books that I fell in love with. I have a few favorite characters. I think I've actually narrowed it down to two: Edmund and Aslan. Lucy and Peter are great, don't get me wrong. I think they're fantastic but I also think sometimes they are a little too good. I didn't like the portrayal of Peter in the movie, Prince Caspian. But at the same time, at least he had some faults in the movie. In the book he's just straight as an arrow. I have as big a crush on William Moseley as anyone else though. It just happens to be a little lesser than the one on Caspian.

Anyway, I digress. I've tried to analyze my feelings regarding Edmund and Aslan to discover why they are my favorites. I think we Aslan I feel a little like Lucy, I always want to see him and I never get enough of him when he's there. He portrays for me very closely what a relationship with Heavenly Father/Christ feels like and I want to know more of him/Them so badly. At the same time, it takes work and as badly as I want that and I feel that desire, I am not always willing to put forth the time and the effort. But we learn and we understand better how to do this bit by bit, just like the Pevensies.

(This is one of my favorite parts, I think it accurately and beautifully depicts the relationship between the sinner and the Savior)

This is, I think, the very reason I love Edmund's character so much. I can relate to him. I admire him for his bravery in overcoming his error. I admire his change of character and growth within The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe and relish in the apparent change between that story and the others he is present in. He is more real to me than the other Pevensies (excluding Susan I suppose, but I never liked her much and after reading all of the stories I feel as if my preconcieved notions are justified. She may be real but not the type of realness that I would like to be.)

I don't suppose my Christmas break could have been better spent. I was captivated by the tale of A Horse and His Boy and the Golden Age of Narnia under High King Peter.
The idea of Narnia being surrounded by other lands and peoples was new to me. I also enjoyed exploring the Narnia underground in The Silver Chair. And the depiction of heaven in The Last Battle, while not completely accurate to my faith (but comfortingly close) on the matter, was certainly not a place I'd mind staying for eternity.

A New Addition

2010-12-27T16:44:00.000-07:00

I didn't exactly reach my goal, but Santa thought I deserved this thing anyway. He also bought me new tires. Just try and tell me Santa's not real.

Boys in Footie Pajamas

2010-12-09T10:24:00.000-07:00

Little boys in footie pajamas are one of my favorite things in the whole wide world. Last night I got to watch three little boys who were wearing them. Consequently these are some of my favorite boys in the whole world. Thus last night was one of my favorite nights.
As I wrapped them up in their blankets like little bean and cheese burritos I realized I'm gonna have so much fun with my own little burritos. But for now, I'm good with these ones--even if they try to remove my fingers because I'm tickling them too much, they won't wash off whatever poop ended up on their faces, or they can't quite get behind the idea of "Rock, Paper, Scissors". (By the way, why are the scissors plural?)

In Amy Jo's Classroom

2010-12-02T11:55:00.000-07:00

I'm supposed to be observing Amy Jo's class right now but I've never sat in a teacher's lounge and learned about the ear and why people are deaf.

I'm Sure You're All Wondering...

2010-10-21T13:42:00.000-06:00

...if there is any way possible for me to actually make 2300 cookies in a little over two months. Let me assure you, there is. I will do it.

That is all. Yeah, that's all I have to say right now.

Over and out.

I Want to Go to There

2010-09-07T19:19:00.001-06:00

Spiral Jetty

Ohhhh Now I Get It

2010-07-31T16:54:00.000-06:00

"It says here:
The average unmarried female
Basically insecure
Due to some long frustration may react
With psychosomatic symptoms
Difficult to endure
Affecting the upper resperatory tract.

In other words, just from waiting around for that plain little band of gold
A person can develop a cold."

Thank you Guys and Dolls, this explains why I am always sick. I get it.

Night of Wonder and Surprise. Mmm.

2010-07-17T22:00:00.000-06:00

So my friends and I sat in kiddie pools last night, drank root beer, and ate pizza. Lacking a slightly larger recreational water repository, is there any better remedy to a long day at work? I propose there is not. Even if ours was not quite as grandiose as this particular model.

However
I don't actually drink soda very often. Particularly sodas not of the diet variety. I do drink my diet coke on occasion. But that's not a frequent occurrence either.
My other favorite thing, besides water-logging my butt in a pool that's actually just my size, is taking drives. Long, peaceful, music filled, mind-numbing drives up Provo canyon.
But I get motion sick in or on just about anything that moves.
So naturally on this drive with a friend who I would really rather not look quite so vulnerable in front of, I puked. The combination of root beer and pizza and driving up a winding road were apparently just too much for the old gut. The conversation went something like this (I might have embellished a bit. What?):

"Um, I think I'm gonna be sick."
"Oh, okay. Sorry."
"I think I'm gonna sit outside so I don't defile your car."
"Oh geez, like for reals? Like you really are sick?"
"Mm." (Couldn't talk much anymore)
"Do you want me to hold your hair back?"
Waved him off
"Um call me over if you need me."
And action. Geez I'm graceful. "Goosh. Cough. Sputter. Goosh. Spit. Cough." Too graphic? I'll stop. You get the idea.
Pathetically: "Ummm can you please come hold me up and my hair back?" In defense of me sounding so weak and whiney, I was gonna tumble down the mountain. And the first thing I would have rolled into was my own vomit.

He did his duty manfully and without complaint and then we got back in the car-- after realizing we were still sitting in front of my own regurgitation well after the deed was done.
Thanks friend, you know who you are. You really took one for the team last night.
I need a new nickname. Pukey Pants? Fainting Fanny? Any other suggestions? I'm an idiot. But I have some stories to show for it ha ha.

Humor Me. Or Don't.

2010-07-07T18:40:00.000-06:00

**LAST....
-Beverage you had: water
-Phone call you made: my sister
-Text message you sent: "When?"
Song you listened to: "Love the Way You Lie". What? I like Rhianna.
-Time you cried: Last night

**HAVE YOU EVER....
-Dated someone twice: yes, a few different people. It might be a bad habit but it might also be me covering my bases
-Been cheated on: no
-Kissed someone & regretted it: I don't know actually, I don't have many regrets like that anymore. You know the whole learning experience thing :)
-Lost someone special: who hasn't?
-Been depressed: yes

**3 FAVORITE COLORS
1. white
2. gray
3. blue

**THIS YEAR HAVE YOU...(2010)
-Made a new friend: definitely
-Fallen out of love: yes actually, it was so gradual I didn't even notice
-Laughed til you cried: I hope so although I can't recall particulars
-Met someone who changed you: yes
-Found out who your true friends were: I don't like this statement, it feels too negative
-Found out someone was talking about you: There's always someone, what does it matter?

**RANDOM...
-How many kids do you want: 3, 4, or 5. Since someone else will be involved I have left room for compromise
-Do you have any pets: two dogs at my parents' house and quite a few snails every time it rains here
-Do you want to change your name: Sometimes but it would be a huge pain. You may all call me "Jennifer Ashlee" though, if you'd really like to make me happy :)
-What did you do for your last birthday: I cannot honestly remember. I was sick I think?
-What time did you wake up today: 7:00 ish.
-What were you doing at midnight last night: Sleeping! Oh my magical!
-Name something you can NOT wait for: graduation
-Last time you saw your mother: April
-If you could change 1 thing about your life what would it be: I would be more frugal, but luckily I can change that. I just have to get started. Good bye shopping :(
-What are you listening to right now: "3 Rounds and a Sound" Blind Pilot

**PERSONAL..
-Whats getting on your nerves right now: peoples' insecurities and my own shortcomings.
-Full name: Jennifer Ashlee Draper
-Nicknames: Ash, Baby Ash, Bad Ash, Scoop, Flat Shoe, Pocket Pal
-Relationship status: single (see last post ha ha)
-Zodiac sign: Virgo
-Male or female: Female
-Elementary: Maplewood in Portland, OR and Dietz Elementary in Tucson, AZ
-High school: Palo Verde High School
-Hair color: Dirty blonde
-Long or short: short I guess
-Height: 5' 1"
-Have a crush: I wouldn't call it that
-What do you like about yourself: I'm not conceited, just self-assured- I like most things about myself :)
-Piercings: one in each ear
-Tattoos: no way
-Righty or lefty: righty

**FIRSTS....
-Injury: stitches in my chin from a duplo block
-Best friend: Ardis Smith
-Sport you joined: Soccer
-Vacation: camping somewhere with the family probably

**RIGHT NOW...
-Eating: nothing
-Drinking: nothing
-About to: burst out of my skin
-Listening to: "More Stars Than There Are In Heaven" Yo La Tengo. This question's getting old.

**YOUR FUTURE...
-Want kids: I already said 3-5. More repetitive questions. Who writes these things? Who fills them out...?
-Get married: That's the plan
-Career: English Teacher (at Timpview with Cassidy)

**WHICH IS BETTER...
-Hugs or kisses: hugs
-Lips or eyes: eyes
-Shorter or taller: medium
-Older or younger: I'm working through this complex
-Romantic or Spontaneous: there should be more options
-Nice stomach or arms: arms I guess
-Sensitive or loud: he'd have to be balanced or he'd drive me nuts. Why so many absolutes?!
-Hook up or relationship: relationships. What am I, 16?
-Trouble maker or hesitant: I've always been pretty detrimentally straight-laced and I think trouble makers bring a little spice to my life ha ha.

**HAVE YOU EVER...
-Lost glasses/contacts: Sunglasses in the ocean
-Broken someone's heart: yeah
-Had your heart broken: yeah
-Turned someone down: yeah
-Cried when someone died: yes
-Fallen for a friend: yes, it's what I do

**DO YOU BELIEVE IN...
-Yourself: definitely
-Miracles: yes
-Love at 1st sight: rarely and not for me
-Heaven: yes
-Santa: if you mean my mother
-Angels: yes

**ANSWER TRUTHFULLY...
-Had more than 1 BF at a time: ridiculous. Plus I am a terrible liar and could never pull it off ha ha.
-Did you sing today: obviously
-Afraid of falling in love: terrified

In the Desert. Alone. Bahahaha.

2010-07-07T18:09:00.001-06:00

The Perks of Wearing Makeup:

2010-07-06T20:19:00.002-06:00

People don't ask you if you had trouble sleeping the night before.

Nothingness

2010-06-26T15:33:00.000-06:00

Geez it's ridiculous that I even have to remind myself to breath sometimes. You might think I'm exaggerating, but similar to the way I grind my teeth and clench my jaw without noticing, I find myself forgetting to circulate oxygen through my lungs. Why? Oh, because my life is stressful and I have more on my plate than I can handle.

FALSE. My life is amazing and I'll never have more than I can handle unless I bring it on myself (which I think I unconsciously love to do. Sick.)

Today I needed a day of rest and relaxation. I mean that seriously. I think if I don't take some time to do nothing on behalf of my sanity that I might actually blow a fuse, short a circuit, whatever.

So my nothingness is cleaning my room, finishing my book, and turning up my radio full blast (must to the displeasure of my roommates below me. Please, who am I kidding? They love it). Next step: shower.

Spontaneity

2010-06-03T17:30:00.000-06:00

Some crazy stuff has sparked some crazy ideas to my brain lately and I feel a sudden urgency to do the most random things in my life.

1. I am reading a book called Stiff by Mary Roach about cadavers. Call me morbid but I'm completely enthralled. I even read it while I'm eating. Yesterday, granted, it was not such a good idea. Del Taco and embalming kind of didn't settle well together. But now I want to take Anatomy in school before I graduate. Why not?

The book is full of random facts you never knew you wanted to know about dead bodies. The following is my favorite example thus far:

"...when we're alive, we expel that gas. The dead, lacking workable stomach muscles and sphincters and bedmates to annoy, do not. Cannot. So the gas builds up and the belly bloats. I ask Arpad why the gas wouldn't just get forced out eventually. He explains that the small intestine has pretty much collapsed and sealed itself off. Or that there might be "something" blocking its egress. Though he allows, with some prodding, that a little bad air often does, in fact, slip out, and so, as a matter of record, it can be said that dead people fart. It needn't be, but it can."

I carry this book around with me everywhere. I can't put it down and people are starting to think I'm a little weird. It has the dead people feet with the little time of death tag on the cover. A little disarming, I know. Maybe I should switch my major to forensics. Just kidding everyone!! Just kidding!!

2. Last night my friend helped me replace my radiator in my car. When I say "helped" I really mean he did it. Naturally, I now want to go work in a mechanic's shop for a year or so and learn how to fix my own cars. It's not that hard. I need tools though... Just another expense, no big deal. But all you have to do is disconnect and connect the hoses. I got this.

3. A friend of mine told me she used to institute a practice called "Naked Wednesdays" at her house. The girls would come home, lock the doors, close the blinds, and wander around naked. Gutsy.
(omitting illustration on this one)

4. This same friend made a drive to the California coast just a few months ago because she wanted to. By herself. She slept in her car. Awesome. I'm doing it. But to Oregon. The magical land of my childhood. Cannon Beach, here I come.

I want to be able to tell my kids I did some awesome things. Like walking around naked... Yeah, I'd probably omit that from my stories to them if I ever actually worked up the nerve to do it. Which I won't. So omission is unnecessary.

But I actually might find it necessary to omit to my parents that I'm planning on driving to the coast by myself. I just need to. In the words of Kirsten Dunst from Elizabethtown, "To have never taken a single, solitary roadtrip...?" And I want to learn anatomy. I want to fix my own car. I can do this. All of it. Why not? And as my father pointed out, I'll never have more time than I do right now.

...and then I hit the floor

2010-05-01T23:07:00.001-06:00

So I was at work doing my job. I am a frequent visitor of that place. But honestly I had just recently returned from a short hiatus that involved a lovely trip to Arizona- that place where it doesn't snow (much, except maybe in Flagstaff). Despite the weather, I was kind of happy to be back seeing as how I am one of those freaky weird people who likes having a routine and thinks that vacation is slightly stressful.

Having missed my coworkers and even a few of my clients, I thought the day was going well. And then it hit me... or rather I hit it... or, even better, my elbow hit it- it being the countertop- and my world went spinning or crashing down, whichever saying you prefer, they're both accurate.

I began to walk back to my computer, feeling a sadly familiar dizzy sensation with each step. With my back turned to my client, I was hoping she hadn't quite noticed my teetering footsteps. As I reached my computer I could convince myself to do nothing except rest my forehead against it. Try as might, I couldn't convince myself to stand erect after I had placed my forehead on the monitor. I couldn't move.

So I told me coworker that I needed him to take the receipt back to the client because I was going to pass out. How did I know this for sure? I'll get to that. He grabbed me by the waist and tried to take me somewhere to sit but I declined. I am stupidly stubborn sometimes. I knew I was going to pass out but I decided to stay standing? Idiot. As he's walking back from delivering the receipt apparently I slumped onto the counter and then my knees gave out as I gracefully swooned into his arms. Honestly, I think he's a lucky guy to have been able to play the Knight in Shining Armor. He said he caught me much more gracefully than I fell... dangit.

Suddenly I was somewhere else entirely, or at least I thought I was. I was dreaming within a fraction of a second. So when I woke up to Ryan standing over me, Richard propping up my feet, and Brendan on the phone saying something about his employee passing out I was caught off guard- as anyone would be. I immediately tried to sit back up. Why I did this I really don't know because that's really not a brilliant idea after fainting. But obviously my faculties were not at their peak.
I love hearing my coworkers tell the story. I turned blue, I was out for fifteen seconds, I wasn't breathing. It sounds terribly dramatic and dangerous. And yet it continues to make me laugh. If I had started seizing or peed my pants I probably wouldn't be so keen to laugh about it. Kevin started laughing because he said I reminded him of the fainting goats. Well that's flattering.

Yep, that's real. Watch it for yourself here.

I really came back to when my boss said something to the paramedics on the phone about an ambulance. I immediately retorted, "I don't need an ambulance!" There are two reasons for my vehement decline of their services. One, I don't like paying for medical expenses and I am stupidly stubborn about seeing doctors. Unbelievable, I know. I'll spend $100 on a pair of jeans but nothing for my health. Two, I knew what had caused my little dizzy spell.

Yes folks, it was my elbow. Because I hit my elbow I blacked out. It's embarrassing, nay, even mortifying. And yet, so ridiculously funny. My friends tried to hit it later that night to see if I'd do it again. First off, nice. As if I'd like to pass out twice in a day. Second, punching my elbow is not going to make me pass out. But how did I know this? Oh, I've done it before. Don't worry, it's normal for people to hit their elbow and pass out maybe once in their lifetime. I'm apparently the only idiot who does it twice though. I called my dad and he just laughed, recalling the incident in high school (imagine waking up to your choir director poised directly above your head) where I'd done it previously. Still, my dad could have shown a little sympathy.

They took me to the doctor the first time and he said it had something to do with a vasovagal response. I included the wikipedia page in case you think I'm making this up. Although it says nothing concerning elbow hitting.

Dear Cafe Rio

2010-04-06T08:53:00.001-06:00

Please don't make me throw up in front of my Spanish tutor again.

Thank you.

Oh Here I Am!

2010-03-31T09:30:00.005-06:00

Sorry guys. Sorry for taking a little leave-of-absence. Relax, I'm back. In honor of my return to the blogging world I have decided to post a few poems that have gracefully fallen from my lips recently. I was just kidding about the graceful part but you could say they fell in a certain manner I suppose.

This first one comes from a dialogue I tend to have with myself on occasion. Yeah, I talk to myself.

My Heart is Broken
One:
The pain in my chest is more than I can bear-
Oh, why this blasted eternal ache?
No God, this life is never fair
If my heart only continues to break.

Two:
Wait, what?
Your heart is broken? you must be dead
Your logical fallacies are hurting my head.
A heart cannot be broken, as you say
but after it stops it can rot and decay.
If rot and decay this moment do beset
then I hope, dear one, your mind is cleared of all regrets.
For soon your thoughts will be no more.
Which will spare us who think your whinings a bore.

This second poem came about when my professor asked me to freewrite about the word "death-marked." Naturally I thought of Muppet Treasure Island and began rhyming from there.

Death-Marked

Upon my brow, I swore there lied

A funny mark thereon that tied

My life to death, quite ominously

Man and woman, both, avoided me.

Don't worry, I know they're weak sauce. I'm taking a poetry writing class in the fall, that should help.

Fashion- Oh How I Love It

2010-03-12T09:43:00.001-07:00

Again, it's one of those things I don't like to admit to. When people ask me where I purchased this shirt or that sweater I will tell them, but I won't like it. I feel like a snob. So I usually add something like, "But I bought it at the outlet!" It makes me feel better, what?

I get this warm fuzzy feeling when people tell me I look cute. Sure, I shrug it off like it's nothing, but deep inside I hoard up all of those moments and when I feel particularly scrubbish I take a peek at them to rejuvenate my fashionista spirits. Something so materialistic probably shouldn't make me quite so happy.

But I had one such moment in class the other day. A friend of mine who's not yet an English major but soon will be said, "You have cool color constructions. I like the evolution of that." Yeah buddy. You know who you are. Bless you.

Book Blurred Vision

2010-02-15T19:37:00.001-07:00

As if I've been drinking, every word I type is doubled-- like there's a mirror image just underneath every single letter. Have I been drinking? you ask. I reply no. Although I'm sure alcohol is absolutely titillating for some, it really has never called my name.

So what is it exactly that has blurred my vision? Only the few, the proud, and the nerdy can truly know what I'm talking about here. I call it "Book Blurred Vision."

Allow me to backtrack in order to defend myself. My life is careening constantly toward chaos (note the alliteration. Thank you. I hope that last period I typed was really a period and not a comma because I can't tell). I'm exhausted by all of the things I have to do! However, I strangely love it. Snuggly holding me together like my best pair of skinnies, my busy life is actually my best friend. I wouldn't be happy without it.

But I can't always be busy. I'm wearing down. The slight tickle/pain in my throat is a warning of impending doom-- or just a virus, if you prefer me to be non-melodramatic. So today, on this lovely president's day, I did nothing. Nothing, that is, but read a book. Was it for school? Oh no friends. It was a book about werewolves... and it was lovely. It was sad, sweet, tender even. And I enjoyed her writing style and how it changed when she changed the voice as a rhetorical device.

Yes, it was young adult. But for all of you shaking your heads at me, I pose a question: Why would my University bother to require a young adult fiction class if they were worthless? It wouldn't. Therefore, day well spent. I just can't see at the moment. Please excuse any typos.

For a Friend

2010-02-09T22:24:00.003-07:00

I have had a few requests for this magical cookie recipe. It's true, after this many cookies it should be a little above par. If you'll all forgive me, I must admit that these are my favorite cookies ever. I realize that seems a little strange to say about my own cookies but I can't help myself. It is just one of the forces that moves me to make more all of the time. As I'm walking home from school, on a very regular basis, I crave these daggum cookies.

So here you are:
3/4 c brown sugar
3/4 c sugar
2 3/4 c flour (add more if your cookies turn out semi-flat)
1/2 tsp salt
1 tsp baking soda
2 tsp vanilla (real vanilla is better but more expensive, fyi)

2 sticks of butter
2 large eggs
Guittard milk chocolate chips (this is very important, don't skimp on the chips, these are the best chocolate chips I've ever had)
Reeses peanut butter chips (I've never tried generic, good luck if you so choose to sojourn down that course)

Heat oven to 375. Mix sugars and butter. Add in vanilla and eggs. Mix dry ingredients, I usually do flour last. THIS IS THE MOST IMPORTANT PART: Add the chocolate and peanut butter chips to your heart's content. I always believe in very, very fair amounts of peanut butter chips. Scoop small amounts out with a spoon and roll into balls (only if you want shapely cookies, of course). Bake a dozen at a time for no longer than nine minutes. Depending on your oven you may want to bake for less time but I highly discourage baking them longer. That is, unless you're a crunchy cookie person. In which case you probably wouldn't like my cookies- it's the gooier the better for me.

Happy baking my friends! Now I really need to get on to new recipes.

The Disastrous Dabbling Poet

2010-02-02T11:54:00.001-07:00

There are days when I realize I love school. I never want to leave! And then I see the tuition check went through my bank account or two books cost more money than my car (okay, I exaggerate, nothing could cost more than my car).

Where else can you sit and laugh as you discuss literature and poetry with people who actually know somewhat of what they're spouting off about? I love it.

Today I discovered a veritable genius among poets. Marianne Moore's poem Poetry has left me feeling inspired to write some. And yes, I do dabble in poetry (when I use the word dabble feel free to imagine me snubbing all of you as I pretend to be superior with my dabbling habits, just realize I'm kidding). I write a fairly crappy poem usually twice a week and bravely put it online for the world to see. Occasionally, I write poetry and store it on my computer, never to be seen by human eyes- that means it's really crappy. Or really sentimental, I don't believe anyone needs to see those.

(Doesn't she just look awesome?)

But when I say she inspires me to write some, I mean she inspires me to write good poetry; to experiment with lines and structure and to know exactly why I use each word and each break. Wish me luck and read Marianne Moore.

By the way, her poem Poetry is where my blog title comes from, if you wanted to know.

Originality and Creativity

2010-01-20T09:18:00.001-07:00

Friends, I am on the hunt for a name for my blog. I believe certain friends or family members of mine think that my blog's title is boring. Let me just defend myself by saying I wasn't planning on becoming a blogger when I began. But now that I'm in it I think I need to throw myself a bone and try not to look so lame.

I'm not entirely sure what the purpose of this post is because if I'm trying to be original I have to come up with the name on my own. Don't worry, it'll be brilliant when I do.

Good Ideas

2010-01-18T20:46:00.000-07:00

Note to self: peanut butter chips with chocolate chips = success.
Also: DO NOT EVER bake longer than nine minutes.
One more thing: less sugar and more vanilla. And it is okay to be picky about real vanilla vs. the fake junk.
Self, this has been noted.

Why Do I Bother?

2010-01-11T11:59:00.001-07:00

I woke up at the crack of dawn this morning to read my Spanish textbook so as not to bomb a ten-point quiz in class at eight. (The crack of dawn translates to 5:45 in my mind.) My professor then proceeded to give us time in class to study before he administered said quiz. It was only after this fifteen minute time period had ended and the quiz had begun that I realized I read the wrong section. I still managed an 80%. How do I feel about this? Perplexed. And tired.

Embarrassing Confession

2010-01-11T11:43:00.000-07:00

I have never endeavored to understand the obsession and recent boom of teeny-bopper hits such as High School Musical and its sequels which, in sheer number, are starting to carry a slight resemblance to all of the The Land Before Time sequels. I wonder to myself, "How many years can these kids possibly be in high school?"

But this weekend I had a fit of guilty pleasures and ended up getting Cafe Rio as takeout and eating it at home while I watched a cheap RedBox flick (which has turned out to not be so cheap since I still haven't returned it. ___ RedBox. Insert your own expletive or curse as you so choose for the ____. I swear by blanks.). Are you dying to know what movie I chose to entertain myself with this weekend? Was it intellectually stimulating? Since my opening talks about teeny-bopper hits and dinosaur cartoons from however many years ago a good guess is probably, uh, "no."

I don't know why I publish these things to the world but I'm going to tell you anyway. 17 Again. I hope you can read that because I won't say it again. More embarrassing though was how much I loved it. I pride myself on enjoying the aforementioned intellectually stimulating entertainment options. Give me 1984 over Twilight and Blood Diamond over Trendy-Predictable-Chick-Romance-Crap. But sometimes I enjoy a good vampire drama, every once in awhile Notting Hill makes me cry, and occasionally I like Zac Efron movies. I purposefully did not look up how to spell his name. I hope I wrote it wrong. Because the most embarrassing part of all of this is the sad cougar-crush I have developed on this barely-graduated teenage icon. Ugh.

I was going to include a picture of him with his shirt half-off but it felt a little like child porn.

New Release!

2009-12-29T10:24:00.010-07:00

Ahh! Blind Pilot just released an EP on iTunes! I was thinking to myself the other day, "Self, we need to find some more Blind Pilot. Too bad I don't think they have any new stuff." Self, you were wrong! And it is so good.

Most of the tracks are just live versions of songs from their first album, 3 Rounds and a Sound, but they're fantastic. They have more of a folky feel to them. Which I love. Folk music is magic. And there are two new songs that are also awesome. It's only available on iTunes so I can only give you this link that gives the little crappy snippets of the tracks, but click here for them. Check out the new versions of 3 Rounds and a Sound and One Red Thread, so far they're my favorites. Tell me what you think.

Recipes Please

2009-12-24T12:08:00.000-07:00

If anyone has an amazing recipe that they would like a baker of cookies to try out would you mind getting it to me? For the most part the cookies will be chocolate chip because I love my recipe for those. But I think I'd like a little variety--as I'm sure everyone else would as well. Post them as a comment or get them to me however you'd like! Thanks! And Merry Christmas!

Babies and Food Babies- Or Neither

2009-12-22T19:17:00.001-07:00

I can be completely rational and realize that I am a ridiculously small person with zero room to whine about weight. However, I am fairly positive that if it were possible for me to gain weight I have done so and done it well. I told my nephew that my stomach was so big because there was a baby inside of it. And he believed me. For those who are thinking, "Is there a baby inside of it?" The answer is no. Don't be ridiculous. And it's not just a "food baby" either. It's been like this for days. The holidays are making me sloppy. If the ground wasn't covered in snow and I had an ounce of desire to run in the freakin' freezing cold then I would go run this off. But I can't...won't... whichever. Thank you Christmas for making me feel disgusting.

PS No, I haven't even started baking all of those cookies yet. I can't wait to see what that does to me.

Cookie Monster's Best Friend

2009-12-17T22:00:00.000-07:00

The goal? 20,000 cookies in a year. I'm going to bake them, not eat them. I want to be known as the Cookie Lady. Yes, I'm serious.

A Cookie Haiku
Cookies seem to be
The gooey, warm, and chewy
Way to find smiles.

And I would add: "Especially my own!" But that would make it a Haiku no longer.

Giving Up Candy and Crap

2009-12-12T13:43:00.001-07:00

So I vowed to give up candy and soda for the sake of my teeth. Soda's kind of easy-peezy for me; I don't drink much of it anyway. But candy is different. My job, strangely enough, provides me with more than ample opportunity to ruin my teeth with chewy candy goodness. You know what though? I don't even like it. I'm just bored. Maybe the real solution is to find a new job.

But my resolve quickly failed when a friend gave me German chocolate. And I mean legitimate German chocolate, she lived there for a year and a half. How could I not eat that? So my question is this: Is it legitimate to give up certain types of candy or does that just sound like I'm cutting corners so I can still have what I want? Curse that friend and her German chocolate. But bless her at the same time.

Musically Speaking, I Might Not Be a Nice Person

2009-12-11T21:22:00.015-07:00

I'm a music elitist, I'll just get it out there. Elitist, if we dumb it down, just means snob. Ok I'm a snob. I like bands with names that have to do with scared bunnies, horses coming together to make music, some kind of weird bear sea creatures, and pilots who can't see. And I like those who name themselves with the French way of saying "good winter" or with strange unpronounceable Persian names.* You don't know what I'm talking about? It's okay, I really don't expect everybody to listen to the same music I do. Freedom to listen to your own music is just one of the many freedoms we enjoy in these United States. Our forefathers fought hard for that one, far be it for me to withhold it from anyone.

But I really do like popular bands too. It's taken me years to admit this and be comfortable with it. But seriously, I love Coldplay. I love them so much that I paid (what to me was) an obscene amount of money for my tickets to their concert here in Utah last November. And I'm not comfortable enough with myself to go to a concert by myself so of course I bought two. Ouch. This is where a significant other would come in handy. . . I'm doing my best folks. Ok and Iron & Wine seems to be becoming significantly more popular so it's with a little chagrin that I claim them as another favorite. But Sam Beam is soooooo good. Emphasis on the "soooooo." And then there's Radiohead too. Geez, when they're on they are spot on. I can replay the crap out of Thom Yorke's voice.

(I'm strangely attracted to this scrawny white dude)

Usually when I like a band I find all of the b sides and ep's. You should see my Iron & Wine collection. Sam Beam is a strange dude but he makes some sweet music.

I might as well mention as well that I'm a huge hypocrite as far as music is concerned. I deleted all sorts of artists and songs from my computer that I considered to be "racy" for one reason or another. A lot of it was some awesomely classic nineties hip hop that just got a little too graphic for me. I still think I made a very adult decision even though I sometimes miss Talib Kweli. It was just time to let go. And yet I keep bands that say the "F" word repeatedly throughout their albums. I justify: "They're more subtly embedded in the song" or "He needed to say that to get his point across." Ridiculous. I am a huge hypocrite. The fact that I'm writing this is acknowledgment of my shortcoming which means that I'll have to fix it, right? Not anytime soon folks. I'm a cold hard sinner I guess. I just can't do it. I am emotionally connected to that music. It stays.

So anyway guys, listen to what you want. I admit that I like stuff that might be deemed embarrassing like Third Eye Blind, Phil Collins (Yeah, I will play "Groovy Kind of Love" at my wedding. Get over it.), or Elton John. I am slightly eclectic. However, I still maintain the opinion that my music is better than yours. But that's why I listen to it, isn't it? Of course I think it's better. I highly encourage a little exploration into some different music. Enrich your life by turning off the latest unoriginal pop darling or the trite country idol (I'm refraining from mentioning names, I try not to give offense when I blog) and tune into the poetic rustlings of a band called Bon Iver or the genuine melodies of Blind Pilot. They're worth your time. Just listen.

*Bands mentioned roundabout-ly or straightforward-ly in this post (and other favorites not mentioned):

Frightened Rabbit (explicit lyrics occasionally... sorry)
Band of Horses
Seabear (don't knock the name til you've tried 'em)
Blind Pilot
Bon Iver
Sufjan Stevens (weird name, sometimes weird music, but he makes up for it by writing songs you just can't live without)
Coldplay
Iron & Wine (subtly embedded "f" words occasionally...)
Radiohead (yeah, a bit of swearing)
Andrew Bird (check out "Section 8 City." Oh my gosh.)
Ryan Adams (no, I didn't mean to write Bryan Adams)

Favorite Lessons Learned

2009-12-09T21:04:00.002-07:00

I'm so stubborn and prideful that I just hate to admit this... But I like to blog. It's true. It kills me to write that down but I think that this very blog was the most fruitful part of this semester. It's fun even though it takes me ages to put up a post. And I don't mean time between posts. I mean I sit here editing posts for hours until I feel as if I'm wasting time in a major way. But I'm doing my assignment, right? Right. Sort of.

I will even go so far as to say that I will probably use my blog to post assignments for students. I like the idea of having a syballus in hand but I don't think it would hurt anything to have an electronic copy for students to access when they need. Some of the technologies we studied I know for sure that I won't use--and no guys, it's not just because I couldn't figure them out. I learned about recording myself on a PowerPoint presentation (I think that was another class) and I just can't figure out how it's good teaching to record yourself and force your students to listen to it. So that probably won't be happening. I would love for my students to make videos and give presentations but I don't feel as if voice recording is necessary or helpful to their active learning. I'd rather have them actually interact with their presentations and thus be actively engaging their classmates.

My other favorites were GoodReads (not shocking since I already love that site) and BeFunky.com (which I used for my final project). I had so much fun on that site and I got multiple comments from other people saying they thought it was awesome so I think it'd be easy to get my students to be excited about it.

(Those are the skinny legs belonging to myself and my two younger siblings)

I'm addicted to this website now. It's a little embarrassing. I should be studying and instead I'm playing with an online version of Photoshop. But it's for my blog, right? So I'm legitimately doing my homework. Yeah, ok, my time management skills need a little revamping.

(This effect is called "impressionist")

The point is (because I realize that I have successfully managed, yet again, to stray from it) that I learned some things about technology despite my disinclination to do so. And I'm actually excited about implementing some of these ideas in a classroom... in another five years when I graduate...

Teaching Creativity with Technology

2009-12-01T23:49:00.003-07:00

I finally paid attention to those ads on the side of Facebook. You know, all those ones that are telling you to cartoon yourself? I actually found a site that is a little bit cooler than that even. BeFunky.com lets you creatively customize photos of yourself through colors and photo effects. Your options go way beyond cartoons. I'm going to have my students get a little creative online and have fun expressing themselves through this website.
To view a complete lesson plan on using BeFunky.com click here.
And here's my sample of how I used the website:

Poetry and Technology

2009-11-30T23:56:00.001-07:00

This video is based on the storyboard previously posted. Some changes were made in the process but the core is still intact-- poetry is the point. To see it fully on the screen just click the link and don't watch it on my blog.

Teaching with Technology @ Yahoo! Video

Technology Video Storyboard

2009-11-30T11:10:00.001-07:00

I have created an outline for a video that I am making right now. If you would like to view storyboard just click the link. The video itself should be published tonight.

Bravo Jesus Colon

2009-11-24T00:25:00.008-07:00

Why, you ask, am I awake at this ungodly hour writing my second post of the day? In all reality, I really couldn't tell you. I only slept for four hours last night, but you know how sometimes your body's too tired to let you go to sleep? Tonight's one of those nights. But I was half-heartedly reading for class tomorrow and came across something called "Books That Never Get Returned." What a masterpiece. I couldn't help but share.

This excerpt is from Jesus Colon's A Puerto Rican in New York:
"There is nothing so difficult as returning a book. My wife's maxim is, 'A book loaned is a book lost.' I would not go as far as that. I would say though that if I could have been present when Francis Bacon wrote: 'Some books are to be tasted, others to be swallowed and some few to be chewed and digested,' I would have suggested that he add: 'and some books are to be read and returned.'
"On this question of returning books we have borrowed, we should not make any exceptions. It has happened to me. It happens to you. It happens to all of us--lenders and borrowers of books."

Oh God bless the man. If anyone is reading this, can I have my books back? And sister, I realize that there is a possibility I still have your copy of Enchantment. Worry not, I continue the search.

The real tragedy is that if I don't get my copies back, I lose my "marginalia" as Billy Collins puts it. But Billy's poetry has been loaned out along with Harry Potter's fourth year at Hogwarts. Holden Caulfield's teenage angst is nowhere to be found in my bedroom (which out of context makes me sound lucky I think), and also a beautiful story about a little girl that steals books during WWII is MIA. That one's called The Book Thief-- appropriate title, no? You little book thieves. Actually I'm pretty sure Scout, Jem, and Boo are in someone's hot little hands as well. Perhaps I need a better system. Or to stop loaning books to ex-boyfriends.

Unexpected But Better

2009-11-23T12:16:00.000-07:00

So I've had this old, worn out iPod for about three and a half years now. Despite criticism from my friends, it was not actually made in 1992. They did not, in fact, make iPods in 1992, in case you're wondering. Honestly, it was free and it worked and I had no intention of letting go of that gem. Ok, sure it had its drawbacks. It only held two gigs, for instance. And it was not what you would call aesthetically pleasing, I suppose. And my headphones were coming apart and my connector cable thingy was cracked. But still, it worked! Why would I waste money when it worked well enough to serve it's actual purpose-- to play music?

But the powers that be decided it was time for me to let go about two weeks ago. I thought it would be a lot more painful to let it go but sometimes my emotions are even a surprise to me. As I was sitting in a certain restaurant (which I'll leave unnamed so as not to incriminate anyone) I was suddenly getting very wet. Yes, my waiter spilled water all over me. I really wasn't mad, things like that don't rile me up really. But it took me a few minutes to realize that my purse was also soaked. In fact it retained water tight like unto a dish. Sorry for the scriptural quotation. And what was safely stashed away in my purse? Oh that's right, iPod. But I really felt no sorrow, no remorse. She was gone and that was that. (I guess my iPod was a girl....)

But it's like all I had to do was let go of what I thought was so great so that something way better could be simply placed in my hand! Enter my new iPod nano! The restaurant bought me a brand new, 8 gig iPod-- yeah, the new ones with the video camera!Spill water on me anytime if that's what I get for it. Sometimes you have to let go of that old crappy iPod in order to receive something even awesomer (yeah I know that's not a word, I made it up).

One Reason I Love My Sister

2009-10-27T20:49:00.000-06:00

My sister told me today that she doesn't think I'm ridiculous. The world is turned right side up again. I'm good. But this cartoon illustrates what my brother-in-law is probably thinking while we're talking.

Applying Internet Safety

2009-10-26T20:32:00.001-06:00

So I discussed internet safety with a member of my family (they will remain nameless but I will say that they are in their late 20's and have two kids) and I asked them how they applied this to their children (both of whom are under five). He--whoops, I mean "they"--laughed at me. Just as I thought they would.

(Obviously this kid is internet safe.)

But when I asked them to please stop mocking me and explained that this was for an assignment they were very agreeable.
I started my research by checking out AdCouncil.org. They have an article on there about sex offenders and how to avoid them online, as well as who's being targeted. They talked about some Public Service Announcements that have been put up concerning this issue and I went back to YouTube to find another video. This one is called Think Before You Post.
It's probably wrong of me to say that I thought a little bit of this was funny. But I might as well just admit it now that I asked. But in all honesty it struck me more than the others that I looked up. I think it's simply applicable to anyone; to all ages.
So as I was talking to my family member, I asked what they do to protect their kids. They said that right now they don't even have the internet on the computer the kids use. It is only used for the educational games they have installed onto it. We then talked about what to do when the kids are older. The answers seemed obvious--don't give anyone your full name, don't meet up with anyone you met online, don't tell them how old you are. An interesting one I found in a video was to never use a screen name that tells your gender. But I think internet abstinence for their youngsters is key. I personally don't think it is necessary for kids to be chatting online with anyone they don't know and so I also think that would be a great way to avoid tricky situations.
We finished up the conversation talking about Elder Bednar's talk that I mentioned in my last post. I think the biggest safety issue for us (meaning my family and I) would be more closely related to spending too much time building up our cyber worlds instead of focusing on our family life. That isn't to say that that is actually a problem now, that would just be the more likely problem, I think.
They were very nice to me once I told them I was doing an assignment and we had a more serious talk when we brought the Gospel into it.

Internet Safety Assignment

2009-10-26T19:04:00.001-06:00

I remember watching Elder Bednar's fireside "Things As They Really Are" when he gave it this past Spring or Summer (whenever it was). It was such an interesting topic and my friends and I just sat and talked about it for a good half hour to an hour afterward.

His point was seeing things as they really are. I remember not knowing what to expect as he began his address. He talks about our bodies being temples and I expected him to proceed along the lines of chastity and physical virtue. But he talked specifically about technology and the internet and the effect that these have on our reality.

He very poignantly describes what he is talking about. He discusses alternate lives online and games that are taking up hours and days of peoples' lives at a time. The scary part was what he said about these people seemingly choosing their fake lives over their real ones. You can't substitute the tangible, physical, human interactions for an Avatar life or World of War Craft.

It just makes me want to be very careful about how much exposure I allow my kids to have to these kinds of things. I even get nervous when it comes to deciding how much television to let them watch or video games to play. No offense to my brothers, but I remember how they used to zone out when they started playing freaking Zelda! (I love you both.) My mom had to turn the game off in order to get any response from either of them.

And then I've witnessed the very problem that Elder Bednar is pointing out in my adult life. Here at college, in a Brigham Young University ward, I have seen ward members choose World of War Craft over social activities, church, and even work. I knew of one guy imparticular who would spend probably 40 hours a week on his computer and only come out for a microwave dinner occasionally.

I don't have kids now and I don't have any close friends or family with internet or video game addictions. As far as my future children are concerned, it certainly can't hurt to think about these things ahead of time. As I watch my siblings raise their kids I can take what they're trying and try it myself later on. As far as my friends and family are concerned I think the best thing to do is just spend real time with them. This class is about technology and its usages but I know there is a limit. My sisters and I like to blog and we keep up with each other quite often using this medium but when I can, I choose to visit with them in person rather than posting random comments on their blogs.

So I began searching on YouTube for some "Internet Safety Videos". After watching a slightly creepy and slightly not well done video I came across this one. The first video actually made me really appreciate this second one but I won't put anyone else through that.

Click here to view a short clip
For another, slightly longer video click here

This video seemed so self-explanatory to me but perhaps my parents just did a good job! I was a little bored as I was watching but then I looked at all the posts beneath that were thanking whoever posted the video. Apparently they really needed to know. And as long as someone got something out of it, it's worth it, right?

More information can be read about internet safety topics by checking out Ad Council online. Just type that into google. They have an informative article about avoiding online sex offenders (yikes!)

I think kids have a lot more things to handle now that are less obviously wrong. The internet can be used for so many good things! But then it can really be twisted into something harmful. We just have to be careful how much time we spend on it ourselves and how much information we give. And then we have to make sure kids understand that too.

Teeth

2009-10-19T11:20:00.003-06:00

I know, the title for this is gripping. But seriously, the stories of my teeth are legendary. I want to know what people did before we had dentists! I suppose they just ripped them out, right? Well that was probably cheaper.

So about a year ago I visited a dentist who discovered ten cavities in my mouth. Sick? Yes, I know. So I vowed from that point on to brush my teeth every day. Oh, wait, I already did! I am not homeless and without a toothbrush. In fact, if the every day dental hygiene habits were effective on me I'd be a great spokesperson for dentistry. Except that I hate dentists. They incite such irritation in me! Every time I go in I get the lecture about having good brushing and flossing habits. Dude! I floss every day. I bet that's more than most, let's be honest here. And even after I began that I still went back to be told I had two more cavities on top of the ten from the last checkup. I am not a child. I take care of my teeth. And no, I don't drink soda ten times a day either. But they give me this condescending "dentist" look that says, "Do you want your teeth to look like this?"

Nice.

So now I have to have a root canal this afternoon. I have to tell you though, even if I have to sit there drooling all over myself for two and a half hours and spend an obscene amount of money on it, at least I will be able to sleep tonight--in theory, that is. And I can stop taking Lortab. Curse that medicine. I wasted my entire Saturday because of that junk. But at least my tooth didn't hurt for those six hours that my stomach did. Way to take the hit, stomach.

<-----My arms look like that after I brush too.

I wrote a poem about my tooth this weekend just to illustrate how unfortunate it is.

To pull the tooth or spend exorbitant amounts to save it?
Spending money on my teeth is against my religion.
I hate teeth.
I think I’ll let it rot.
I hope I marry a dentist.

The moral of the story, kids, is brush your teeth and visit your local dentist so he can make his fortune by cleaning your pearly whites. In ten years it'll be my veneers he'll be cleaning. Maybe they'll be easier for both of us- he and I. But he'll be able to retire after that anyway.

Google Sites

2009-10-19T10:44:00.000-06:00

It is interesting to notice that as I began taking this course (kicking and screaming against technology) I also received a very involved calling in a ward that uses nothing but google docs. Hello crash course to technology! My bishop texts me when he needs things, it's hilarious to me. But also helpful. Yesterday I forgot about one of my weekly meetings (in my defense, I don't even remember being told about this one) and he was able to text me and remind me and I was there only about fifteen minutes late! Yay for texting! But as for google docs, bless them! They have saved my life! Our ward directory is on a google doc, our calling list is on a google doc, visiting teaching is on a google doc, and the list goes on.

I chose to use a google site for my class site because I'm so familiar with google. I think the google sites are a little more user friendly, but that's just an opinion. Most of the things I've done on my blog have taken some time and study to figure out (yes, I am aware that I sound pathetic) and I knew I wanted something a little easier than Blogger is for me. It was also very simple to add a google calendar to a google site and since I knew how to do a google calendar already my choice was pretty cut and dry. But just to make sure no one thinks I hate Blogger, I tried to do one on WordPress first and it was even more complicated to me. So yay for Blogger : ) I also wanted to try out a different site than what I'm using for my blog. We're supposed to be exploring different sites and options, right?

"My Job In Relation to the Topic of Hell" and "Stop"

2009-10-10T22:55:00.000-06:00

I've been slacking on my poeming lately but here are two of the latest. If you're not feeling slightly serious probably don't read the second one.

"My Job In Relation to the Topic of Hell"
Endless typing, typing, typing.
Hold. No hold. Loan. No loan.
Country music in the background.
Oh and that phone ring!
“Is that a fire alarm?”
“No it’s just our phone”
Count your drawer
Count your coin
Count the number of times you’ve said,
“Hi, I’m Ashlee. How can I help you today?”
Count the number of times you’ve said,
“I’m sorry sir, I can’t do that.”
“That’s against our policy.”
I know, you hate me, I get it.
I’m the devil.
I know.

"Stop"
Sometimes you have to stop moving with the world.
Going backward isn’t the answer–never was.
But your body seems to lack the strength, hurled
Against a wall that seems to block your attempted withdraws.

I remember crying and you asked me to stop.
And I couldn’t.
Couldn’t stop from fearing that potential drop.
And I wouldn’t.
Wouldn’t let go because it felt good somehow.
I realize that’s all wrong now.

Temple Hair

2009-10-10T17:59:00.001-06:00

I look forward to a period in my life when I no longer have to get wet when I attend the temple. (If I have any readers that are not members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints I have posted a link so you can read up on the church's sacred ordinance of Baptisms for the Dead.) I do not mind sacrificing at all but my hair suffers from the chlorine. . . And from my lack of a desire to fix it afterward.

This morning Kati and I went at 5:45 (ok it was more like six by the time I dragged myself out of bed. I keep turning off my alarm unknowingly. I'm going to have to relocate it I think) and seeing as how I hadn't gone to bed until two last night there was no way I wasn't going back to bed when I got home. Lately the evening wait time has been close to two and a half hours. I didn't know the baptistry had an overflow until this semester started. Now I know.

With this in mind, Kati and I have rearranged our schedules and try to make Saturday mornings our time. Even at six in the morning it took us an hour!
I wish that it could have gone a little faster if only for the fact that I looked hideous. And for all of you nice people that are thinking, "No Ashlee, you couldn't possibly": first, bless your hearts and second, it's sadly true. Blood-shot eyes and lack of cover-up on the annoying left-over-from-picking-stupidly-at-my-blemishes marks come together to make me quite a sight at six a.m.
I think the best part of my appearance by far was after going to sleep with semi-wet hair and being woken up by my roommate at about 10:30. I was a sight. Now that I think about it I really wish that I'd taken a picture. So I have provided the next best thing-- an action figure version that I found on google.
So the whole point of this was so that I could post a picture of this. I have a roundabout way to get to the point, don't I?

I'm the one on the left.

Sonnet 2- Mine, Not Shakespeare's

2009-10-03T23:02:00.001-06:00

I enjoy being humorous and when I look over my blog I like to think I'm fairly amusing. Sometimes I'll give myself a little chuckle and say, "Oh Ashlee, you've outdone yourself this time." Just kidding.

Although I enjoy humor I've been in a pensive mood today. Thus I wrote a poem that doesn't quite have the funny edge to it that most of mine do. No, it's not about flowers. I just like visual aids. Plus I took that picture on Temple Square in Salt Lake so it kind of fits.

My thoughts move fast- they’re raging in my mind.
I crave the kind and numbing drug of sleep.
For such sweet castles built in sweetest time-
Dreams. Would that I should sink so fast and deep.
But attain that rest I certainly cannot.
Decisions loom and agitate my heart.
I’m wearied, worried, heartbreak not forgot.
Anxious, I rise and tears begin to start.
Then I’m compelled to fall upon my knees
And feel the comfort hardest to describe.
For on this earth there is no greater peace
Than that from Him who once for us did die.
My faith restored I climb back into bed
And happily I gently rest my head.

I'll Never Grow Up

2009-10-02T12:12:00.001-06:00

I woke up at the crack of dawn this morning to attend a teaching convention in Sandy, Utah. I mean no disrespect to educators or to our keynote speaker, but that was boring. Goo. The real problem was that I've already read the book by Wong & Wong that Doctors Wong and Wong both presented and I didn't need it reiterated.
There were a few highlights to our early morning expedition, however. Number one being the eight dollar meal voucher (I didn't pay for the convention so it was pretty much an extra eight bucks in my pocket) and number two being the little bit of time I had to write a poem. Thank you Daily Poetry Club for guiding my creativity : ) The title of this post is based upon the fact that free food and dinosaur poetry gets me more excited than lectures. If that's what the choice is between, though, I choose to remain a child.

Prehistoric Heroes is what we'll call this bit of genius.

These giant creatures roamed the earth
Before the dawn of man had had its birth.
It’s a good thing you and I were not around
Cause they’d have squished us like pancakes real flat on the ground.
Or bitten our limbs off with very sharp teeth
Or knocked us about like a twig or a leaf.

But truth be told I wish I could see one right now.
This two hour lecture makes me furrow my brow.
Of course over notes I choose poetry instead.
But after I’ve finished poeming please shoot me in the head.
Or maybe this is where those big guys would be handy
Their massive destruction would really be dandy.
I can think of nothing that would clear a room faster
And there I’d be sitting just filled with wicked laughter.

I don’t even care if the T. Rex eats me first
Cause sitting through this lecture is absolutely the worst.

The Lorax is on the Banned Books List?

2009-09-30T14:12:00.001-06:00

I'm generally annoyed with the subject of banning books but when I found out they banned The Lorax I realized it was time to use my blog for the betterment of mankind. Not that anyone reads my blog except my family. Oh and my classmates--who incidentally are coerced to for a grade : )
Seriously guys? "The Lorax"? Good grief. Not only that but The Giving Tree and Harry Potter. Okay I'll give them Harry, witchcraft and wizardry is dangerous after all. As are free-thinkers. Better just to get rid of books and shift our right arms so they are raised at a 45 degree angled, palm-down salute to our fuhrer. Wait, where are we again? Oh that's right America. Narrow-mindedness is a disease and there is a cure. It's called reading.

As my sister said in her blog (http://nikkimantyla.wordpress.com/), I do recognize the need for censorship for our children. But as she also said, which I feel a need to second, is that each parent should be able to make the individual decision for their children. I don't pretend to be an ultra liberal, I'm not even close. And while I don't believe that every facet of life should be explored and declared a form of art or literature I do believe that there is beauty and joy to be found unexpectedly in some of these books that we are banning. What is the point of a book like Catcher in the Rye? Maybe there is a teenager who just needs to know that something they're feeling is normal. And To Kill A Mockingbird? It teaches us to avoid prejudices and racism. Obviously somebody missed that point. And what the devil is wrong with The Lorax? Is it because we think they are tree-hugging liberals? Maybe we should kick all the liberals out of our country while we're throwing the book out.
My response is probably not as educated as some but I couldn't help ranting for a minute. I don't even usually write during the week but I couldn't help myself. Just let the kids read!

Kicking Where It Counts

2009-09-26T14:55:00.000-06:00

Well it happened. I finally got to teach the seventh graders. The very same seventh graders that took advantage of me in my weakened state last week.
I had known about this for at least a week and a half ahead of time. But true to my nature I didn't prepare really until the last minute. In case my professor happens to ever read my blog I'm going to refrain from telling you how much.
These kids don't want to be there and they're a little hard to teach. I tried to make it fun! We studied natural disasters and we talked about current events like Katrina (which, by the way, was 4 years ago. Weird, huh?), and I asked them to share any of their own disaster stories. My mentor teacher gave me a funny survival book that I can never seem to remember the name of and I read that to them as well. They liked that part.
So their assignment afterward was to
option 1) Write a short story about a disaster--real or made up, serious or funny
or
option 2) Write instructions on how to survive a disaster or emergency--again, serious or funny
I have to share my favorite one. I started laughing out loud as soon as I read it and I even made a copy of it before I handed all of their papers back to them. Alex starts, "if Barrny comes and kills evryone here are the rules"
1. Find a place to hid[e] but not that hard Barrny is stuped
2. use what ever you can as a wepon
3. come out of hiding slowly or he will kill you
4. look at your suroundings
5. run for your life
6. Don't fall for the "I love you" he wants you to come out so he can pump you full of led
7. Whach for flying Balls of fire
8. have a friend But not that good [a] friend so if he goes to shot you put you "friend" in front of you.
9. if he finds you kick him in the tenders
10. these rules may not work good luck
Oh my gosh I was dying! "Kick him in the tenders"? Seriously? So funny! I would have given him full credit just from making me laugh so hard but he missed the vocabulary. They only half-listen to me. I also got more than a few stories about killer bunnies and how they attacked the world. I began to wonder where the fascination with rabbits came from. When I got in the car to leave I noticed that I was wearing my shirt with a pattern of bunnies all over it. I suddenly knew where they received their inspiration. I promise they're not killers on my shirt.

A Little Plug For Poetry

2009-09-26T14:18:00.000-06:00

This is my little spiel on how much I love poetry and at the same time it is a little plug for a few of my friends. They have recently begun a website called the Daily Poetry Club. For anyone who is an aspiring poet or really just feels like letting their creative, poetic juices out of the corners of their minds they've been hiding in, sign up and start writing! You don't have to be good, everyone is very supportive. Although the little thumbs up/thumbs down button at the bottom is a little unnerving people don't push those too much unless you're off topic. And let me just say here, don't go off topic. I almost lost my membership due to an incident with this. I luckily sweet talked the president into letting me stay. Phewf.

Now on to my love for poetry. A good chunk of the things I read come from my big sister. It's taken me a few years to realize I don't really care if I'm following in her footsteps. Our brains are far too similar for me to pretend I don't like all the same stuff she does. I even stole the idea for that picture of my books from her. As we've gotten older it's been nice to see her copy me every once in awhile as well. I steal her favorite books, she copies my haircut; I choose the same major, she begs me to take her shopping. This list makes me feel superficial... ANYWAY. Geez I get off topic so easily. The point is that she introduced me to a little Billy Collins, whom I have quoted below. After a lesson in my Shakespeare class I decided suddenly that I was going to be a poet. She figured if I was going to write it I should have a little more of it to read. The one book I had wouldn't cut it apparently. She made me fall in love with the poem "Marginalia" which I have taken the liberty of copying a few stanzas of.

We have all seized the white perimeter as our own
and reached for a pen if only to show
we did not just laze in an armchair turning pages;
we pressed a thought into the wayside,
planted an impression along the verge.

Even Irish monks in their cold scriptoria
jotted along the borders of the Gospels
brief asides about the pains of copying,
a bird signing near their window,
or the sunlight that illuminated their page-
anonymous men catching a ride into the future
on a vessel more lasting than themselves.

And you have not read Joshua Reynolds,
they say, until you have read him
enwreathed with Blake's furious scribbling.

Yet the one I think of most often,
the one that dangles from me like a locket,
was written in the copy of Catcher in the Rye
I borrowed from the local library
one slow, hot summer.
I was just beginning high school then,
reading books on a davenport in my parents' living room,
and I cannot tell you
how vastly my loneliness was deepened,
how poignant and amplified the world before me seemed,
when I found on one page

A few greasy looking smears
and next to them, written in soft pencil-
by a beautiful girl, I could tell,
whom I would never meet-
"Pardon the egg salad stains, but I'm in love."

Billy Collins
Sailing Around the Room
Marginalia
http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/marginalia/

Nyquil vs The Aspiring Teacher

2009-09-21T23:11:00.000-06:00

Last week was rough. I was continuing on in my field study of the average middle schooler experience, I learned quickly that appearing weak to your students does not do you any favors as a teacher. I had a pretty legitimate cold for most of the week and even missed a day (terrible, I know). With the pressure of missing school and work and all of my other responsibilities looming over me, I chose to push myself through the rest of the week. These are not happy memories for me. Nyquil is not your friend if you want to be awake and alert the next day. And when it claims an adult dose is two tablespoons, it’s lying to you.
P.S. Who made up the word homophone and can we pick a substitute for it for Jr. High students? As if they need any help thinking of sexual innuendos.

"Copyright and All Its Glory" or "Mr. Duey the Fraction Man Obeys Copyright"

2009-09-19T13:11:00.000-06:00

I first just want to say that I hope I never become desperate enough to rap to my students as did the teacher in one of the videos I watched. Oh dear. But maybe it works, what do I know? The English teacher in "10 Things I Hate About You" raps one of Shakespeare's sonnets and I didn't mind that. I could get into all kinds of stereotypes to explain why that's okay but I digress. As usual.
I first watched a video entitled "Pay Attention", the material of which actually interested me because it was mainly focused on how we are doing as teachers (I include myself by using "we" because I just like to pretend sometimes that I'm already there...) with integrating technology. A good choice for this class, no? But also a good choice for this assignment because the creator brought in a lot of facts. To their credit they included copyright information throughout the entire video. My only critique would be that they did not include the copyright of the song playing in the background. I could be wrong, but I thought that was included under the copyright rules and guidelines.
As for Mr. Duey the Fraction Man, our rapper extraordinaire (yikes), I actually didn't see anything out of line with copyright. He definitely wrote that song himself. Or if he didn't, the person he stole it from probably doesn't want credit anyway. Too mean?

Way to Go Goodreaders!

2009-09-19T11:39:00.000-06:00

After reading another blog about Goodreads I wanted to add my two cents about the site. It is spectacular!
Recently, my 276 class had a little field trip to the library. Now I will be perfectly honest, usually I have a really hard time staying on task and keeping my hot little hands from taking my focus off of the presenter by grabbing the ridiculously tempting mouse in front of me and searching the web to my hearts content. But the education librarian, Rachel Wadham, presented to us about the very websites I would have chosen to peruse anyway! It was fantastic!
I might as well just admit to everyone now how much I love Young Adult fiction. With the recent popularity of the Twilight saga and other such novels it seems I get nothing but flack from my Reading Elitest friends. But back to the point. Rachel took us to Goodreads. Through this site I have found out that Rachel has read over 4000 books and a good chunk of those (perhaps even a fourth) are YA Lit. Yay! I suddenly find the courage to stand up for my ridiculous reading habits and say, "I can read what I want friends! I enjoy the juxtaposition of Hemingway and Meyer on my shelves. So there."
Goodreads allows you to list all of the books you've read, which is spectacular because I've been trying to write those down for years with little success because I simply cannot remember them all at once and I unfailingly lose my list shortly after my half-hearted attempt. Now I have my list neatly saved online. And that isn't the only perk (I feel like a commercial ha ha). No, you can also categorize your books. Be as narrow or as broad as you want. And as you add friends and waste time checking out what they're reading/have read you'll usually find more and more books you forgot you read way back when. Bless my dear sister's little heart, without her I would have forgotten half of the books of my childhood.

I'm a Chicken

2009-09-07T12:51:00.000-06:00

I'm starting to feel redundant but I'll say it again. I don't know a lot about technology. I bought a mac computer because it was supposed to be more user friendly. I don't believe it. I don't understand computers. I'm not that old, I'm supposed to have a greater capacity for technological ideas, correct? I guess my biggest goal is to not be a chicken and just try. I always get this uneasy feeling in my stomach when I'm about to do something that I don't understand perfectly. But that's part of life, isn't it? So my goal is to be brave! So here we go!